Home Happiness & Self-Love 7 Little Habits That Stole My Happiness

7 Little Habits That Stole My Happiness

written by Nida May 3, 2017

As I get older I realize that being positive or trying to lead a happy life is a constant effort & a constant battle with your inner self. There are numerous times when I felt that I let little things & petty issues steal my happiness. I literally have to jolt myself back to sense, talk to myself explaining the pros & cons to let something so small control my happiness. As the clock ticks, we don’t even realize that we are stuck in the monotony of life & are unhappy deep down. There are certain changes I have made in past years that has helped me a bit. I still feel down & that’s completely normal but I literally grab myself and pull myself out over & over again. Now let’s get down to business:


1.Waiting for the Moment: 
Do you feel that you are constantly waiting for a perfect moment to be happy? Maybe after getting a certain job, a certain opportunity or after buying a certain car or anything, I will be happy.  Imagine going to the store & be like can you please pack me two pairs of happiness. No, right lol. Happiness is not objective or something you can buy. It’s hilarious when people say that money can buy you happiness. Yes, money can buy you comfort but not contentment. Happiness is felt from within, from deep inside your heart.

2.Stop the Comparison &  Take Control:
Do you feel overwhelmed by looking at other people’s life, to an extent that you start judging your own? you stop giving credit to yourself & all the amazing things you have achieved. Just because you do not click a photo & post it on social media, it doesn’t make you any less successful. There are 2.3 billion social media users. Imagine how much information is thrown at you while you scroll down your feed. Don’t absorb or consume that information & most importantly don’t compare. Not just social media, even on a daily basis we meet people & instantly start comparing our lives to them. Whenever a comparison thought pops up in your head, pause & stop yourself from over thinking & remind yourself that your life or you are not less than anybody else.

Don’t compare your Chapter 1 to someone else’s Chapter 20.”

 

3.Worrying & Overthinking (End the Cycle): 
So I am sitting around worried about something & I start over thinking about the outcomes or eventually what will happen blah blah & it turns into a vicious cycle, Worrying-Overthinking-More Worrying. I literally stop myself & that is where faith steps in. Having faith keeps us sane. Otherwise, how will everything make sense at the end of the day? You need someone to blame or in better words, you need someone to put your trust on & sleep peacefully. That someone is God. Worrying & overthinking will solve nothing but prayer can. I started literally having a chit chat with Allah, I would share my problems and just pour my heart out. It’s the most peaceful experience & it helped me cope up with a lot of problems.

4.Being too Hard on yourself: 
Sometimes I go overboard on this one, that’s why you might have noticed that a lot of my Instagram posts are related to self-love & positive life. I failed to understand that there is a time for everything in life & right now my time is to take care of my 16-month-old. One of the major reasons why I wanted to get back to writing & blogging was because I wanted to feel I am worth it. After completing my Masters I had a vision that I will be working at a certain position but things didn’t work out that way. Since then I have been struggling & failing to accept that it’s okay! Every journey is different & it is always one step at a time. After being connected to so many beautiful souls on social media, I am pretty much at peace now. I am doing exactly what I was supposed to do! inspire & motivate. So stop kicking your butt unnecessarily. Give yourself some time & a lot of breathing space.

5.Negative Surrounding/ Toxic People:
There was a time in my life where I was constantly surrounded with so much negativity that it started making a big impact on my life & personality. Whenever you feel that you are with someone who doesn’t do anything except complaining. You need to get away from that person asap. We don’t realize but subconsciously our mind registers all the negativity that is thrown at us. We might not direct our life towards it but it does affect our mood. Life is short. You don’t want to be surrounded with people who are constantly looking for “what’s wrong” instead of “what’s right”.

6.It’s all in the Looks: 
No, it’s not. Do you have a hard time accepting compliments from people? A lot of times when I get a compliment I try to shy away from it or put myself down by saying really, are you sure? Because I have a certain image of perfection glued in my head & If I am not up to that mark, I can’t be beautiful. We are bombarded constantly with images of celebrities & now social media influencers with their perfect life & their hair on fleek or hijab on fleek & I am here sitting in my pj’s comparing my Pj moment with their beautiful dress moment. Do you get what I mean? When we dress up I am sure we look just as pretty in our own way.  Life is not made of perfect moments, it’s a bunch of imperfect, messy moments that make it worthwhile.

7.What others think or say:
For God’s sake, why does it matter? I completely understand that it’s human nature to find approval, I do it too. I look for appreciation all the time but only from the people who matter to me like your family, really good friends. People who truly know you will support you in every venture. & people who love to criticize and pinpoint anything that’s wrong are surely not your wellwishers.  This is a trial and error process, don’t be too quick to judge & put them in your “I don’t care” list but be observant. It’s totally useless to worry about what the world will say as long as you understand who & what matters. 


I loved writing this post & was thinking about doing so for a while. I hope you liked it, don’t forget to comment & pin it.

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18 comments

Monis Ansari May 3, 2017 at 7:34 pm

Quite appealing. Keep on writing.
It’s wonderful.

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Nida May 3, 2017 at 8:53 pm

thank you :)))

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Alya Inam May 4, 2017 at 4:08 am

I read all your blog posts and I shud say that this post is surely going to benefit lots of educated housewives.
I admire your patience in self development. Keep on doing the gud work.

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Nida May 4, 2017 at 5:05 am

Thank you, not just housewives actually for everyone who goes through these issues.

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Sumaira May 4, 2017 at 9:15 pm

Great advice Nida! My goal has always been to live a positive life and I love that we are both on the same page! I just love reading your blog posts- they are inspiring! xoxo

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Nida May 4, 2017 at 9:21 pm

Thank you so much sumaria! I pretty much try to do the same & try to resonate what I went through with my readers 🙂 feels awesome that you like it.

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Shakera May 4, 2017 at 11:53 pm

Number 7 is eating me alive ! also it was nice to get to know you more ! Congratulations on your bundle of joy!!! 16 months !! Ma sha Allah!!!

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Nida May 6, 2017 at 5:55 am

I know. i hate no 7 too!! its so hard to get over it.

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Lima Esha'al May 5, 2017 at 2:34 am

Written beautifully! I quite enjoyed reading this post. <3

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Nida May 6, 2017 at 5:55 am

awww thanks lovely

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Daniela May 6, 2017 at 3:16 am

So wonderful to read this. Love how real you are and how you talk about these issues that we all go through to some extent.

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Nida May 6, 2017 at 5:55 am

thank you so much for being so kind and taking out time to read this <3

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Kiara May 8, 2017 at 11:23 pm

Get caught up in comparison and negative talk and negativity altogether are three huge things I stray away from brcause it can lead to destructive behavior with those bad habits. I agree with your list here and loved reading your take on them!

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Nida May 9, 2017 at 5:45 am

Thank you so much! It was so great to read your comment about my post 😀

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Erica @ Black Bloggers Network May 9, 2017 at 12:05 am

I must admit that I’m an overthinker. I think through 5 different scenarios before making a move. Definitely need to work on this. Thanks for the great tips!

Erica | Black Bloggers Network
NEW POST: 5 Secrets to Explode Your Blog Income: How One Blogger Earns Over $100,000 per Month

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Seppy May 9, 2017 at 1:02 am

Love this blogpost – every point speaks to me. I like that you are framing it as things that are stealing our happiness because you’re right, at the end of the day, we are doing this to ourselves and we need to constantly build our capacity to get over these unhappy moments and negative perspectives.

http://elleisforlove.com/mental-emotional-health/how-to-take-care-of-yourself

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Nida May 9, 2017 at 5:45 am

Exactly. Thanks for sharing the link to your post! I am just going to read it. I am sure it will be awesome!

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Sheri McDonald May 9, 2017 at 1:38 am

So true, and the reminder came at the right time. Thanks!

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